Confessions of a woman lover

Saturday, December 30, 2006

Audience Factor

One day me and sandy came

Testing testing
Warming up
U know, its funny, but I need to warm up before I can write my heart out.
I cannot sit down to write something, the writing needs to flow out naturally.

Right now, I am slightly high on ganja, though to be honest, it is not much right now, and I’m attempting to write. I started writing quite vociferously, a few days back with T. But she is backpacking in some distant country right now, and I’m trying to keep up the writing tempo I was in. I really wanted to talk about my audience factor concept. That’s where this piece started from – one day me and sandy came up with this concept of audience factor. And I think what I’m trying to do here is build rapport with the audience before I start writing on the main topic. This is what audience factor is – everything we do is done for an audience. Well, not everything. For example I normally don’t dig my nose for an audience, but other than that just about everything we do is done for an audience. I know, you’re going to say - no, that’s not true, I care for poor unprivileged children and I do it only for my own satisfaction, and not for anyone – well, you’re wrong. Things like that are especially done for an audience. I’m not saying that we are all attention junkies, but there’s always an invisible audience to whom we are playing up. It’s a different matter that whether we are aware of them or not. Who is the audience depends on you. It can be a parent, it can be your future soulmate (my most regular audience member), it can be God for the religious, hell! it can even be you yourself if you have mild schizophrenia (which I think most of us do!).

Now the memory of the articulation of this concept is becoming clearer to me. I remember me and sandy discussing the fact that we quit our well paying jobs to start a new venture would be such a great story for the audience. And how, at times, we actually do things to play up to that unseen audience. For example my decision to sell my bike during a particularly bad cash crunch was again partly done for the audience factor. While on the whole it was something I wanted to do – I knew it would force me into fitness, but the decision was made all the more attractive by the audience factor. This act of selling my bike allowed me to convey to all my audience members (in this case primarily my family) that I was determined to make this venture work.

For most of my personal activities, my future soulmate is my audience. I don’t know who that will be, but I imagine her looking on as I scale personal heights. I remember going on a crazy adventure trip to Uttranchal – no plans, just got on a bus to Uttranchal and let fate take me forward, and during that whole trip I could feel my future soulmate would be an audience to this in the future, but I was acutely missing her in the present.

In business life, I imagine the students of MDI as one type of audience. I envision being called back to college to address the students on my experiences as an entrepreneurs, and teaching them the lessons that business taught me. I also envision myself getting interviewed by someone like Vir Sanghvi or some CNBC type of interview where I talk about how I built up my business and what were the lessons that I learnt on the way.